Greenhouse Mischief

Tower Universe - One Shot

NOTE: Loki (reformed villain) hangs around Avengers Tower or SHIELD facilities whenever he thinks up some way to mess with the Avengers. Most of the time, it's minor mischief just to annoy them.

This time Loki enchants one of Gwen’s plants to talk. It gossips about her using her own subconscious thoughts. Loki claims it is just “scientific curiosity.”

One afternoon, Gwen Barkridge visits her greenhouse lab. She steps into the familiar space and breathes deeply, taking in the familiar scent of soil and flowers.

She sets her notebook down on the ‌table and walks through the rows of plants, hovering her hand over them as she goes, fixing anything that might be wrong with them, and picking up signals from them about their environment or their feelings.

Loki lounges against a nearby shelf, idly twirling a small dagger between his fingers. "You know, most botanists don't treat their plants like they're therapists. Then again, most botanists aren't you, are they?" His smirk grows as he watches her work.

Suddenly, one of Gwen's nightshade plants perks up—far more than it should be able to—and blurts out, "You still think about that SHIELD agent from the Budapest mission. The one with the nice arms."

Loki's grin widens as Gwen freezes mid-step. "Oh? Now that’s intriguing."

Gwen's eyes go wide, and she drops her hand back to her side. Loki is here? Why? But more importantly, why and how did that plant just talk? She looks at it curiously.

"What did you just say?” She asks the plant, her voice ‌barely above a whisper.

Loki pushes himself off the shelf and saunters over to the nightshade plant, his gaze flicking between it and Gwen. He feigns surprise, although his eyes gleam with mischief. "Oh, you mean you didn't know your precious little plants are capable of spilling your secrets?"

The nightshade plant rustles excitedly, as if in agreement.

She turns to Loki, a bit flustered that not only is her plant talking, it's talking about something that she has only thought about. "First, what are you doing here? Second, how would the plants know my secrets? It's not like they were in Budapest, not that I'm saying I was in Budapest... especially not with...arms."

Loki tuts and taps the plant’s pot with one long finger. "Oh, darling, you forget—plants remember. They absorb emotions from their keepers. Yours are particularly chatty." He leans in closer, mischief dancing in his eyes. "And as for why I'm here? Let’s just say … I was bored. And a little science experiment never hurt anyone."

A pause. Then the nightshade pipes up again: "She also thinks about Thor without a shirt sometimes."

Loki gasps dramatically and clutches his chest. "No! My brother?!"

Gwen suddenly turns red. "That's natural! I mean... I have eyes, and he looks like that and..."

Loki's grin turns positively wicked as he circles her like a predator—except for the fact that he looks absolutely delighted by this turn of events. "Ohhh, so you do have taste! But let’s not pretend your interest stops at looking, does it?"

The plant rustles again, unable to resist adding, "She once told Natasha his muscles were 'unfairly distracting.'"

Loki barks out a laugh and points at Gwen triumphantly. "See? The evidence is stacking up against you, Agent Barkridge."

Gwen looks at the traitorous plant and threatens, "Stop or I will shrink you back down to a seed."

The nightshade plant gives a shiver and wilts a bit, intimidated by Gwen's threat.

Loki, however, remains unperturbed. In fact, he seems even more entertained by her reaction. "You know, I never pegged you as the vengeful type. It's a little... attractive." He leans in closer, invading her personal space, his eyes raking over her.

"Yeah, is it?” She shoots back. “Well, after I'm done with the plant, I'm going after you. We'll see how attractive it is then when I have you dangling from the ceiling as my new chandelier."

He holds up his arms in mock surrender, laughing at the image she just conjured up yet somehow managing to look amused and unshakeable at the same time. "A chandelier, eh? You wouldn't dare. I'm far too handsome to be reduced to interior decor." But despite his cocky front, the thought of the feisty botanist dangling him upside down makes his smirk falter for a moment.

"Oh, I think it's the perfect place for you. You'll be up there, out of trouble, the centerpiece of the room and center of attention, just what you want, right?"

He lets out a dramatic gasp, pressing a hand to his chest. "You wound me, truly." His grin returns, sharper this time. "Though... if you're dangling me like some trophy chandelier," he leans in closer, "does that mean I'll be the center of your attention too?"

The plant rustles weakly, smart enough not to comment again but still eavesdropping shamelessly.

Gwen rolls her eyes and shakes her head. She huffs softly and turns back to the plant that he enchanted. "You can turn this off now."

Loki feigns innocence, though there's an undeniable gleam in his eye that says he definitely doesn't intend to cooperate that easily. "Hmm, turn it off? And why would I want to do that?" He circles around her, leaning in to whisper in her ear and making sure that the nightshade plant hears every word. "I'm quite enjoying the dirt your little leafy friends are digging up on you."

"Yes, the fascinating 'dirt' about the SHIELD agent with the nice arms and Thor... “ she says flatly. “Just idle thoughts."

Loki raises an eyebrow, clearly enjoying this back-and-forth more than he should be and enjoying seeing Gwen all flustered and annoyed too. He leans on a nearby shelf, arms crossed and his gaze roaming shamelessly over her.

"Ah, yes. Quite idle thoughts... and yet, there's no sign of any other suitors in your life, is there, Agent Barkridge? No one you're currently interested in?"

The nightshade plant rustles impatiently, clearly ready to add more fuel to this fire.

Gwen smirks. "And you care about my personal life, why? Or is it all just fuel for your little mischief?"

Loki laughs, his eyes glittering with a glint of mischief. "Oh, you know me so well, Agent Barkridge. I'm all about mischief-making." He pushes away from the shelf and starts slowly circling around her, his voice dropping to a low tone. "But I can't deny there's a certain curiosity... I mean, here you are in the prime of your life, beautiful, smart, and single, yet no one has managed to catch your eye? Not even a little?"

The nightshade plant perks up again.

"I'm not going to talk about it with you." Gwen snaps, crossing her arms. The plant could have talked about anything, and it chose that.

Loki grins wider than ever. He leans in, invading her personal space. "Ohhh, but that's the fun part, Agent Barkridge." He lifts a hand to her chin. "You see, the way you're so defensive about it just makes me want to poke even more. It means you definitely have secrets to hide... and I do love unearthing secrets."

Before the plant can speak again, Gwen waves her hand, and the plant reverses its growth back down into a seed, disappearing into the soil. "There. Problem solved. Secrets can stay...earthed."

Loki blinks at the now-empty pot, momentarily speechless. Then he bursts into laughter, genuinely delighted by her quick thinking and ruthless solution. "Oh, you are fun," he purrs, circling her like a pleased predator. "But you realize this means I'll just have to get more creative with my interrogation methods."

He flicks his wrist and suddenly the entire greenhouse hums with faint whispers from every plant in reach. They aren’t speaking clearly yet … but they will soon if she doesn’t stop him.

Gwen could reduce the entire greenhouse back to seeds and then regrow them when he leaves. It wouldn't be difficult. Or she could make good on her threat to string him up with vines. But no, she wants to see what Loki wants.

"And you chose to interrogate me and not someone else in the building? I am the lucky recipient of your attentions today? Goody."

Loki tilts his head and grins, sensing the hint of sarcastic reluctance in her voice. He's thoroughly enjoying this little game between them.

"Oh, you are indeed the lucky recipient of my attention today, Agent... and you're the one I want to interrogate." He narrows his eyes mischievously as he prowls closer, stopping just a few inches away from her.

The plants begin to grow louder, picking up on the rising tension in the room.

Gwen glances around at the plants. Which one will talk next, and what would they possibly share? Can they read her thoughts right now? In true scientist fashion, she decides to test it.

Gwen represses a smirk as she thinks of something about Loki. She wants to catch him off guard. She thinks about the pictures in his SHIELD report, the ones of him in a tuxedo in Germany. She also replays the conversation she had with Natasha. Yes, they talked about Thor's muscles but also talked about Loki and how good he looks in Earth clothes. If  the plants like sharing her thoughts about the fleeting attractions she had to others, then they'll love this.

Loki, who has been studying her every move with a sharp eye, doesn't miss the slight smirk on her face or the flash of humor in her eyes. He senses the change in her demeanor and he's curious. What is she thinking now, he wonders? As he moves even closer, the plants grow quieter in anticipation of what's to come.

And then...

The voice of another potted plant fills the room, echoing through the greenhouse with a hint of laughter in its words.

"She once thought you looked 'damn good' in a tux."

Gwen laughs. This could be fun. She immediately starts thinking of other things about Loki. It doesn't matter whether they are true; the plants will share it.

Thoughts go through her head of Loki in various scenarios: what he'd look like in that sweater she saw in the store window the other day, or how he'd look tied up in vines, at the beach–actually that one would be kind of funny to imagine.

The plants, absolutely thrilled to have juicy new thoughts to spill, burst into a chorus of whispers:

"She thinks about you in sweaters."

"And vines. Definitely vines."

A fern adds, "Also the beach? Not sure what that’s about, but she was picturing sand and, uh... very little else."

Loki's smirk freezes mid-tease. "Well," he croaks out after a beat, "I wasn't expecting that."

Gwen grins now. If he wants to turn her plants into petty gossips, she’ll weaponize them.

She continues to think of Loki in a variety of funny and embarrassing ways. What about holding hands in Disneyland? He would hate it. How about wearing a nice suit and working at an office job? Or what about...?

The plants practically vibrate with excitement, barely able to contain themselves as they pick up on Gwen’s thoughts. The whispers grow louder, more dramatic:

"She just imagined you holding hands at Disneyland—wearing mouse ears."

"Office job! She’s picturing you in a cubicle. With a coffee mug that says ‘World Domination Mondays.’"

A sassy flower chimes in, "Oh wait—now she’s wondering if you could pull off Hawaiian shirts."

Loki visibly twitches at this onslaught of ridiculous scenarios. His smirk has officially cracked into something between horror and reluctant amusement. "You're evil, Agent Barkridge."

She bursts into laughter as she continues to let her thoughts run wild.

Loki narrows his eyes, but the corner of his mouth twitches in begrudging amusement. He points a finger at her. "You—you monster."

The plants are practically giddy now, their whispers growing louder and more ridiculous with each passing second:

"She’s now thinking about you learning to knit."

A nearby cactus chirps in, "And wearing fuzzy socks. Matching sets."

The nightshade (somehow still vocal despite being reduced to a seed earlier) wheezes out: "...Falling into a pool fully clothed???"

Loki throws his hands up in surrender, though he’s clearly biting back laughter himself. "Alright! I yield! You win! I regret ever enchanting these traitorous little weeds!"

Gwen laughs and her thoughts continue until they slip… Loki, wet in the pool, clothes clinging to those muscles he's hiding...That intense look he gets that makes her want to grab him and ... She stops suddenly.

The plants, sensing the abrupt shift in her thoughts, go completely silent, then erupt into scandalized whispers:

"Oh. OH."

"We are not equipped for this."

A delicate orchid wilts dramatically. "I need a chaperone."

Loki, who had been mid-grin at his own defeat, freezes as the atmosphere in the greenhouse changes entirely. His sharp eyes lock onto Gwen’s face, searching, assessing. Then, slowly, his smirk returns.

"...Well now," he murmurs, stepping closer with deliberate slowness, "that's interesting."

Gwen turns pink and takes a step back.

"Those were just... I didn't mean it like that... I was just trying to embarrass you."

Loki chuckles, clearly enjoying the flustered state she's in. He takes another deliberate step forward, the gap between them shrinking down to inches.

"Oh, they were doing a fine job of embarrassing me. That pool scenario?" He whistles softly. "But don't play coy, Agent Barkridge. Now that the plants are silent," he leans in closer, "I want you to look me in the eye and tell me you didn't mean every wicked thought that just ran through your head."

She tries so hard not to smile as she looks at him with a defiant glint in her eye.

"I didn't mean them, except maybe the one about you doing laundry."

She is lying. She will not admit that her thoughts betrayed her, and that they strayed in a very detailed and inappropriate direction.

Loki hums in amused disbelief, circling her like a predator who knows exactly when his prey is bluffing. "Laundry? Really?"

He stops right in front of her, tilting his head with a smirk that says he’s not buying it for a second. "You know I can spot a lie from across the Nine Realms, right?"

A beat. Then, he slowly lifts a finger and boops her nose. "Gotcha."

Gwen scrunches her nose and bats his finger away, trying to maintain her composure but failing miserably. "You're so insufferable," she mutters, a mix of annoyance and reluctant admiration.

Loki laughs. He's having way too much fun tormenting her with her own thoughts. He takes another step forward, cornering her against the edge of a plant table. "And you're fascinating."

The plants are silent now.

Gwen crosses her arms, refusing to let him fluster her further, even though he already has.

"Listen, Laufeyson," she says with a stubborn lift of her chin, "if you’re expecting some grand confession just because my subconscious betrayed me for five seconds—"

Loki interrupts by tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, his fingertips lingering deliberately against her skin. "Oh no," he murmurs, "I'm patient. I can wait."

The plants whisper faintly:  "...We are WITNESSES."

Gwen waves her hand and reduces the plants to seeds. The once lush greenhouse is now simply pots and soil. "Alright, that's enough of that. I hope you had fun."

Loki gives an exaggerated pout as the last of the plants disappear, feigning disappointment. "You really are a buzzkill, Agent Barkridge." His eyes flick over her face, taking in the slight flush in her cheeks. "But I suppose I can think of other ways to entertain myself." He reaches out and tugs on one of her curls, twirling it around his finger.

Gwen tries to ignore the way her stomach flips when he touches her hair. She's a grown woman, for goodness' sake. She should NOT be this affected by an Asgardian prince/ex-god of mischief/former villain with a questionable fashion sense.

She tries to glare at him, but it's difficult to look stern when he's standing so close. "Yeah? And how do you plan on entertaining yourself?"

Loki’s smirk deepens as he slowly leans in, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "Oh, I have plenty of ideas. For starters..."

He flicks his fingers and suddenly the greenhouse is filled with tiny glowing illusions of miniature Lokis, each one dramatically reenacting embarrassing moments from her thoughts (Disney ears included). Meanwhile, the real Loki watches her reaction with far too much amusement.

"Too much?" he purrs.

Gwen laughs, partly out of embarrassment and partly out of surprise that he would do this now.

"Oh, that one is definitely my favorite."

She points to a miniature illusion of Loki dancing in his full armor and helmet.

Loki snaps his fingers, and the dancing-Loki illusion freezes mid-shimmy, then promptly dissolves into gold dust with a very dramatic death wail.

"Ah, but you’re missing the best one," he says with a wicked gleam in his eye.

Another flick of his wrist and now there's an illusion of him sprawled dramatically over her lab desk, clutching a tiny plant like it’s a dying Shakespearean character: "Alas... Gwen never returned my texts..."

The real Loki is clearly having WAY too much fun with this.

Gwen laughs again.

"You are ridiculous. Is that one of your thoughts? You want me to text you?"

Loki scoffs, but there’s a beat too long before he does, as if caught off guard by the question. "Pfft. Please. I don’t want anything from you."

Lies. The plants would've called him out immediately if they weren't currently seeds.

A pause. Then, with forced nonchalance, he adds, "...Unless, of course, you're offering?" His smirk returns, but it's noticeably less smooth this time.

"Fine. I promise to text you so you don't turn into a melodramatic desk ornament."

She shoos him off playfully.

"Now, get out of here and let me do my work."

Loki raises an eyebrow, taken aback by the unexpected concession. "Wait, really? No arguing, no snide remarks, just a straight acceptance? No one's ever agreed to that so quickly."

He takes a few steps back, his smirk growing into a smile that almost approaches genuine. He gives her a theatrical little bow. "Alright. I shall leave you be. Just...one more thing before I go."

Gwen narrows her eyes suspiciously, already bracing herself for what's to come. "...What?"

Loki grins, slow and knowing, then suddenly flicks a finger toward the nearest pot. The soil shifts, and a tiny sprout bursts forth, growing unnaturally fast into...

A single flower. A forget-me-not.

Which is absolutely not symbolic at all.

"Try not to miss me too much," he teases, but there's something softer in his tone as he steps backward through one of his illusory doorways, "Agent Barkridge."

Poof. He’s gone—leaving only the faint scent of mischief and magic behind.

Gwen sighs and shakes her head in exasperated amusement. After a moment, she gestures and regrows all the plants back to their original state, this time without all the talking.

She leans over one of the full tables and scolds them with a small smirk.

"Traitors."

Most of the plants have the decency to look sheepish, except for the cactus. The prickly bastard. It just sits there unbothered, as if it had nothing to do with this entire situation.

The nightshade, of course, looks smug as hell.

The End