Chapter 12
The Asgard Universe - The Twins of Fate Saga - Summary/Content Note
The moment they arrive, the golden spires of Asgard loom overhead, but Thor wastes no time. He marches toward the palace with purpose.
"Wait here," he tells Gwen near one of the courtyard gardens. Then, in a rare act of mischief for him, he adds with a smirk, "...I have an idiot to retrieve."
Minutes pass before she hears hurried footsteps and then there's Loki. His hair is slightly disheveled from what was clearly Thor dragging him here against his will.
"This is ridiculous," Loki snaps as his brother shoves him forward. "There’s nothing to discuss."
But then he actually looks at her.
Gwen keeps a neutral face and stands there still and silent, letting Loki take her in. She spent months telling herself she didn't want this moment with Loki. She wanted him to come to her and wanted him to come without knowing about the babies. She wanted him to come because he wanted her.
Loki's eyes, usually so sharp and full of clever words, go utterly still. He scans her face, the soft swell of her stomach barely visible beneath the Asgardian gown, and his breath catches just slightly.
She hears Thor quietly back away to give them privacy.
"You're... here," Loki says finally, voice quieter than she's ever heard it. His hands twitch at his sides as if he wants to reach for her but isn't sure he's allowed. "...Why?"
"Oh well, I left my favorite pair of sunglasses here..." She answers sarcastically as if the answer wasn't completely obvious. She pauses for a moment before huffing slightly, upset with herself.
"This was a mistake. I knew it was, but I came anyway..." She turns away from him.
He moves before she can take a step, one hand catching her wrist, gentle but firm.
"Don't." His voice is rough, almost desperate. "Don’t go. Not yet." His fingers slide down to weave with hers, hesitant but deliberate, as he steps closer. When she turns back to look at him, there's no smirk, no clever deflection. Just raw honesty in his gaze. "...Tell me it's mine," he breathes, "and I'll spend every second proving I deserve you both."
She wants to answer. She opens her mouth to confirm, but instead all her thoughts come tumbling out.
"You never came to visit. You never sent a message or gave me any clue that that night meant anything. I thought it did but then you were gone in the morning without a goodbye. I should have expected it but silly me for believing you of all people, right?"
He sighs heavily, fingers tightening around hers almost subconsciously. The tension in his lean muscles is tangible, like a tightly coiled spring ready to snap.
"I was trying to give you an out," he admits quietly, eyes downcast, unable to meet hers as he finally confesses, "I wanted to give you a chance to return to a normal life. You don't want a life with me. You deserve far better, and you and I both know that."
"That's bullshit. I know you better than you think, and I know when you want something, you find a way to get it without a care for anyone else. If you had wanted me, you would have done something."
His fingers tremble faintly as he lifts his gaze to hers, the raw honesty in his blue eyes like shards of glass in his soul.
"I did want you," he says quietly, almost tenderly. "I wanted you from the moment I saw you. You were smart, strong, gorgeous... but more than that, you didn't give a damn about titles or power. You were just... you. And I wanted that. I still do. More than anything." He takes a shuddering breath and confesses. "I gave you an apple so you’d never be bound by the mortal world again. I never imagined you’d bring a mortal piece of me into it.”
"That apple..." she says softly, almost to herself. "I thought it was just some godly gesture, not... whatever that meant." She shakes her head, half-smiling. "Guess it doesn’t matter now."
"You want me because I'm me, not because of..." She touches her belly.
His gaze drifts down to where her hand rests atop her stomach. Something flashes across his face like pain, regret, maybe, or fear. But he shakes it off quickly before meeting her gaze again, a small, bitter smile playing at the corner of his mouth as he steps even closer. His fingers slide up her arm to rest against her shoulder, thumb absently tracing the delicate freckles beneath her eye.
"I want you…" he says again, quieter this time. "And I want this child."
"Children," she corrects, gently. "Twins. Boy and girl."
If possible, Loki's eyes widen even more at her words, his jaw going slack as his gaze drops back to her stomach. For once in his life, he looks completely speechless.
"Twins?" he breathes. His hand drifts lower to press gently against her stomach—and he seems to do it without even realizing it, like he can't help himself, like he needs to feel the babies for himself in order to believe it.
Would you like to know what I've been calling them?” She pauses with a smile. "Varian and Liv. Sorry for not asking your opinion first."
The smile that blooms across Loki's face is wide, completely unguarded and full of tenderness. His fingers trail over her stomach again, as if he's committing its gentle curve to memory. "Varian and Liv," he repeats quietly, testing the names on his tongue. He glances up at her hopefully. "...they're beautiful. Are you... are you sure you want me in their lives at all? I can do many things, but I have no idea what to do with a baby—much less two."
"You'll figure it out if you want to, that is. I will leave it up to you. You decide what you want; I won't force you...but Thor might." She laughs again.
"He's threatened worse," Loki admits with a snort. Despite everything, a small smirk appears on his face. Then he catches her gaze again, something almost vulnerable in his eyes as he whispers, "And yes. I want to. More than you know, but..." He hesitates, fingers tightening ever so slightly around her hip. He looks almost pained when he forces the words out.
"...Are you... are you still angry with me? For leaving without saying goodbye?"
"Yes." She doesn't hesitate to answer truthfully. "Of course I'm still angry and hurt. You made me feel like an idiot. It's one thing to have a one-night stand and know that's all it is; it's another to spend it the way we did, with everything we said, and then leave without a word."
He flinches as if she's struck him. The hand on her hip curls slightly into a fist before he forces himself to loosen it, jaw tight with guilt.
"I deserved that," he mutters darkly, looking away for a moment. Then his gaze snaps back to hers, raw and unguarded in a way he so rarely is. "But I swear to you, on the Nine Realms themselves, it wasn’t out of indifference. I thought... foolishly... that if I stayed longer, it would only complicate things when you inevitably left."
A bitter laugh escapes him as he shakes his head. "And yet here we are."
"Here we are..." She repeats softly. "Totally uncomplicated and ...totally alone for months."
His grip on her hip tightens slightly again, as if he's struggling to keep himself from pulling her closer.
"I'm here now, aren't I? I'm staying. Anything you need, you only have to ask."
He says it like a promise, but his eyes keep flickering to her stomach again—like he can't believe the proof of two children is there beneath their hands.
She nods. She doesn't know what she needs from him. She had done this alone for months so far and was prepared to be alone with the twins indefinitely.
Loki studies her expression, the wariness there, the hint of uncertainty. He can read her like a book at that moment, and it makes his chest ache. Slowly, he lifts his other hand to frame her face between his palms, thumbs caressing her cheeks. His eyes roam her face like a starving man before finally meeting her gaze again, so impossibly tender that it's a stark contrast to his usual arrogance.
"Gods, you have no idea how much I missed you," he breathes. He's shaking—barely, but it's there. Just enough of a tremble for her to feel.
"I missed you," she responds so softly. One night together. One night full of drinks and games, jokes and arguments, playfulness and passion. A single night forged a connection so strong that they both know that this will never be over.
He lets out a sharp exhale as if her confession steals the breath from his lungs. His fingers move to thread through strands of her hair, his eyes tracking the motion like he can't believe he's actually allowed to touch her like this.
"I kept thinking you would forget about me," he admits quietly, the words catching in his throat. "I wanted you to, I wanted you to be happy and forget me and find a man who deserved you, but..." His gaze drifts to her stomach again before returning to her face. "Clearly, the universe had other plans."
"It's you, Loki. It's been you since the moment we met on that balcony."
His touch sends a warmth through her that she has been missing since that night. She does her best to wrap her arms around his waist but can't pull him too close since her belly gets in the way.
He lets out a choked laugh, half amusement, half disbelief, as his arms wrap carefully around her in return. His chin rests gently atop her head, fingers tracing absent circles against the small of her back.
"And it'll be me until my last breath," he murmurs into her hair. Then he pulls back just enough to kiss the top of her head before meeting her eyes again with a small smirk. "...Unless you'd prefer I prove that vow on our wedding night instead?"
"Oh, don't start with big ideas like weddings. Start with just today."
He chuckles low and warm, and tucks a strand of her hair behind her ear.
"Today, then. But just know I'll be holding you to it later," he murmurs before pressing another lingering kiss to the top of her head.
"We should get you settled first. Have you eaten? Should we..." His eyes dart toward the nearest bench like he's assessing how comfortable she must be standing for so long already. His overbearing concern would almost be amusing if it weren't so endearing.
She nods and takes a seat on the bench.
"We have a lot to figure out. We can't do this from two realms. I don't know how... We couldn't even be together, so how are we supposed to do this? I don't belong here. Do you think I'll even be allowed to stay? And you are a criminal on Earth, so..."
He takes the spot beside her with a weary sigh, resting one arm along the back of the bench to toy lazily with strands of her hair.
"One thing at a time," he reminds her quietly and gives her hip a gentle nudge with his knee. "I will handle the 'allowed' part of the situation. That much I can ensure. Odin might be a stubborn old bastard, but I know how to speak his language." He gives her a reassuring smile. "And the rest can wait. We'll figure it out, I promise."
Gwen rests her head on his shoulder. Even though there is so much to figure out now that Loki is back in the picture, she is relieved to have him with her again. She trusts he will do everything he can for their new little family.
His breath leaves him in one slow, contented exhale as she rests against him. His fingers thread gently through her hair, tender and reverent, as if he still can’t quite believe she's here with him again.
"We'll make it work," he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. "No matter what."
And for once in his life of tricks and schemes... he means every word.